Actual, Real Life Fun with Airport Security

My flight out of Newark next week is at around 11:30 AM. Aunt Sue has an 8 AM flight out of Newark, so to save gas and aggravation for my family and friends, I'll be hitching a ride with her. This, of course, will put me at the airport several hours ahead of the recommended arrival time for my flight, so I'm going to have a lot of time to kill. Davezilla's recent post on airport security has inspired me: I'm going to pack something outrageous in my bag just to see the reaction of the TSA people. You are going to help me decide what it will be.

It's important to note that this is not a dig at the TSA people (who have been nice every time I've dealt with them), and not an attempt to get myself red-flagged for a strip-search or an anal probe. I just want to try to make somebody laugh; is that so wrong? With this in mind, there are two important rules:

1. The object must not be able to be construed as a weapon.
2. It must be extremely cheap (preferably free) because a) I don't want to spend too much money on this, and b) I want to be able to throw away whatever it is if I encounter a humorless luggage screener.

Suggest away. I'll pick a winner here and share the story when I get back.

July 11, 2003 - 01:54 PM