Maximum Aardvark: Bowling http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/bowling/index.html Don't Make Any Sudden Moves en-us ajs@maximumaardvark.com Copyright 2006 2006-02-08T13:34:58-04:00 hourly 1 2000-01-01T12:00+00:00 Holy Shit! Bowling in the Times! http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2006/02/08/holy_shit_bowling_in#holy_shit_bowling_in_the_times And just in time for the end of the season! Too bad the author seems to know next to nothing about bowling. Tim Wheeler’s “solid left hook” is probably no... 1475@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ And just in time for the end of the season!

Too bad the author seems to know next to nothing about bowling. Tim Wheeler’s “solid left hook” is probably no match for Amy’s right jab.

Interestingly, I only noticed the article because a crop of the associated picture was on the Times’ front page, and I’d recognize that awful blue-green color anywhere.

]]> Bowling 2006-02-08T13:34:58-04:00 Just When I Thought I Was Out... http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2003/02/12/just_when_i_thought_i_was_out#just_when_i_thought_i_was_out I haven't written about bowling lately. Actually, the last time I mentioned it at all was back in October. Why? Because I suck. My Mad Bowling Skillz have gradually declined... 857@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ I haven't written about bowling lately. Actually, the last time I mentioned it at all was back in October. Why? Because I suck.

My Mad Bowling Skillz have gradually declined since I've come to college, and I'm now averaging about 15 pins under what I did late in my high school career. I don't blame anyone but myself, of course, because I don't practice enough and don't seek out competitive events, but it's frustrating just the same. Some people bowl for fun; I bowl for sport. It's a fine line, and I can't really walk it too well.

So, for the last month or so, I've considered quitting. Just giving up. This is a big deal, because bowling has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. It's in the blood. Just the same, I've thought about dropping it entirely, because it's not fun anymore.

Before I left last night, I said to Amanda, "OK, time for me to go to hell. Oh, I mean Valley Lanes." She asked me to say hi to Satan. "Satan! Satan!" I replied.

Then I got to the lanes and started bowling.

I threw 19 strikes last night and left only three opens, resulting in a 220-238-189-647 series--my highest since July. It was fun again, for no good reason. This is what bowling does: Just when you think you're out, it pulls you back in.

I naturally attribute my success to my brief stint of Satan worship before leaving for Valley Lanes. I thank my Dark Lord for His assistance, and implore His guidance in future bowling endeavours. Satan! Satan!

]]> Bowling 2003-02-12T20:21:01-04:00 http://www.maximumaardvark.com/mt/mt-comments.cgi?entry_id=857 Missing In Action http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/10/29/missing_in_action#missing_in_action Tonight was my last night of bowling for three weeks, as I've got concerts to attend the next two. Fortunately, that'll give my tendinitis a chance to heal (though all... 704@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ Tonight was my last night of bowling for three weeks, as I've got concerts to attend the next two. Fortunately, that'll give my tendinitis a chance to heal (though all the Aleve I've taken in the past week helped tonight). Unfortunately, I went out on a sour note, as my first game featured six(!) opens and was, without a doubt, one of the worst games I have ever bowled in my life.

Mike didn't show up, either, but somehow we managed to take three points, bringing us back up to a .500 team.

AJ: 144-213-200-557
Karen: 154-178-150-482

And now to resume my Tuesday-midnight ritual, catching tonight's 24.

]]> Bowling 2002-10-29T23:40:43-04:00 Tendinitis? http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/10/23/tendinitis#tendinitis A conversation between Mom and Dr. Winn, her chiropractor, raised the possibility that my nagging finger injury may be tendinitis. The suggested course of treatment is three Aleves twice a... 685@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ A conversation between Mom and Dr. Winn, her chiropractor, raised the possibility that my nagging finger injury may be tendinitis. The suggested course of treatment is three Aleves twice a day and icing at night. I'll give it a try.

Mmm... icing.

]]> Bowling 2002-10-23T19:27:41-04:00 No Creative Description for Sucking http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/10/22/no_creative_description_for_sucking#no_creative_description_for_sucking All we did tonight was suck; except for Karen the third game, that is. We managed to win the third game, too. Coincidence? I think not. On a related note,... 683@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ All we did tonight was suck; except for Karen the third game, that is. We managed to win the third game, too. Coincidence? I think not.

On a related note, the condition of my ring finger on my bowling hand has deteriorated to the point where every ball I threw resulted in a sharp pain up my arm nearly to my elbow. Mom, please make an appointment with a Doctor that handles this sort of thing over Thanksgiving break.

AJ: 157-181-181-519
Karen: 114-171-213-498
Mike: 193-124-163-480

]]> Bowling 2002-10-22T23:53:25-04:00 The Season's First 600 http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/10/15/the_seasons_first_600#the_seasons_first_600 Team 8 should have won four points tonight, but we were stymied by a brand new league bowler and, for the second week in a row, OOS. The number two... 671@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ Team 8 should have won four points tonight, but we were stymied by a brand new league bowler and, for the second week in a row, OOS. The number two bowler on our opponents' team tonight bowled 220 the third game, 90 pins over his average and 40 pins over his previous high game. Thankfully, we escaped with two points. On a happier note, I shot my first 600 series of the year, missing only three spares all night.

AJ: 198-205-206-609
Karen: 136-145-169-450
Mike: 179-201-208-588

]]> Bowling 2002-10-15T23:51:02-04:00 http://www.maximumaardvark.com/mt/mt-comments.cgi?entry_id=671 Team 8 Gets Crushed http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/10/08/team_8_gets_crushed#team_8_gets_crushed Team 8 suffered from Overachieving Opponents Syndrome (OOS) tonight, as our opponents bowled a combined 100 pins over their average the second game. We were lucky to escape with the... 654@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ Team 8 suffered from Overachieving Opponents Syndrome (OOS) tonight, as our opponents bowled a combined 100 pins over their average the second game. We were lucky to escape with the one point that we did.

AJ: 179-192-191-562
Karen: 154-166-177-497
Mike: 153-155-206-514

]]> Bowling 2002-10-08T23:52:05-04:00 Karen Fell Asleep at Bowling http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/10/01/karen_fell_asleep_at_bowling#karen_fell_asleep_at_bowling OK, Karen didn't really fall asleep at bowling, but she came damn close a few times. We didn't bowl horribly, but we got beat bad by a team coming off... 640@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ OK, Karen didn't really fall asleep at bowling, but she came damn close a few times. We didn't bowl horribly, but we got beat bad by a team coming off of a difficult first week (so their averages were artificially low). Combine that with their #2 bowler having the best night of his life (a 469 series), and we never stood a chance. We were lucky to take the one point that we did.

AJ: 221-200-178-599
Karen: 159-172-127-458
Mike: 151-203-172-526

]]> Bowling 2002-10-01T23:37:18-04:00 Team 8 Redux http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/09/25/team_8_redux#team_8_redux Tonight was the first night of JMU Club Bowling. Karen and I are back as the core of the venerable Team 8, and this year we've recruited Mike Lewis to... 624@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ Tonight was the first night of JMU Club Bowling. Karen and I are back as the core of the venerable Team 8, and this year we've recruited Mike Lewis to fill the void left by the loss of Corey to graduation.

In any first week of a handicap league, it is nearly impossible to win everything. Establishing averages makes it extremely difficult. Yet, somehow, that is exactly what we did tonight, winning the first game by a comfortable margin, and winning the second and third games by two and eleven pins, respectively.

I also wound up with a relatively low average (173), thanks to the inconsistent shot that I've come to expect at Valley Lanes.

It's going to be a good year.

AJ: 163-156-201-520
Karen: 160-152-171-483
Mike: 180-242-179-601

]]> Bowling 2002-09-25T00:19:23-04:00 http://www.maximumaardvark.com/mt/mt-comments.cgi?entry_id=624 The Bowling Hall of Fame http://www.maximumaardvark.com/archives/2002/09/23/the_bowling_hall_of_fame#the_bowling_hall_of_fame Mark Pilgrim's b-link today is to the Bowling Hall of Fame. I've actually been there.... 617@http://www.maximumaardvark.com/ Mark Pilgrim's b-link today is to the Bowling Hall of Fame. I've actually been there.

]]> Bowling 2002-09-23T09:35:28-04:00 http://www.maximumaardvark.com/mt/mt-comments.cgi?entry_id=617